Catching up!

Life has been really busy for me lately and it has been a good kind of busy! 

I have officially started my internship and I am getting adjusted to being away from home 9 hours a day four days a week. When I get home it's straight to making dinner and getting the herd to where they need to go! Since I have been getting up so early I've been heading to bed shortly have the herd and haven't taken the time to write here. I want to incorporate blogging and exercise back into my daily routine, I just need to get it figured out. No pressure though because I am not trying to stress out! 

I am loving my internship! I love being out of the house and doing something. I am a lot happier now that I have this going on. I am probably getting ahead of myself, seeing as how I have not been on site very long, but I am hopeful that I get hired on at the end of this internship. I did not know that I would have an interest working in a residential treatment program, but I am really enjoying it. I am currently just a shadow and it's been a really cool experience. I am ready to start transitioning back into the workforce. 

The herd seems to be adjusting okay so far to my not being here when they get home from school. I thought I would have some guilt about being away, but that's not the case at all. I get home about 45 minutes or so after they do so that helps. 

I didn't realize how much I needed this internship for my sanity. I have always had a bit of regret for leaving my employment to become a stay at home mom. I love my herd and I just had a hard time adjusting my role. I feel normal and more like my old self now and I just feel lighter and happier. It makes me a better and more patient mom and wife. So far so good! I hope it continues to go well!!

I have tomorrow off and a to-do list a million miles long! The first thing on my list is to catch some zzz's after the herd gets on the bus in the morning. Then I can worry about what else I have to do. 

Until next time, 

xoxo 

Alopecia Awareness in September

I am still trying to cope with my diagnosis and deal with the trauma that comes with losing my hair. I know that this is something I will deal with for the rest of my life. Acceptance is hard, but it is what I am working towards.

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Until next time,

xoxo

September Goals

I saw this on Neely's blog and thought it was a great way to keep track of my monthly goals!

(Via)

September Goals-2017

1. Wash and wax wood floors
2. Clean out under the stairs
3. Pack lunches daily
4. Pull out fall decorations
5. Get an A in my class
6. Schedule microblading consultation
7. Blog at least 4 days per week
8. Take more pictures and include them in blog posts
9. Visit the apple orchard
10. Exercise 3-4 days per week (run at least once per week)


I have a lot of goals that I'd like to include, but it is best to not overwhelm myself and create an impossible list. September is going to be about figuring out a balance with interning Monday through Friday, while taking 3 classes, taking care of our home and our herd. I'm excited to see how I do!

Until next time,

xoxo

Friday Ramblings

*I am so over this new medication. I am tired of the mood swings, the heartburn, the upset stomachs, the sluggish way I feel all damn day. 4 more days and it will be done. I can do this.

*Today sucked. That's all there is to say about it. Every night I pray for things to change, for me to change and grow, and I'm starting become impatient because my prayers aren't being answered. Well at least not yet.

*I like that I have my blog to come and write on, it gives me a sense of peace. I don't like that I've been doing a lot of whining and bitching here lately, but it is how I'm feeling and I just need to roll with it. I am hopeful that once I get out the heavy and negative things that are weighing me down because I hold them in, things will look up. I sit, I write, and I am not sorry about any of it. Why should I be? People (gross generalization here) apologize way more often than they should. I know I do and that's why I've been working on doing it less. It's okay for me to not be sorry about shit. Life happens.

*School shopping is exhausting and expensive! I know that it comes at the same time every year, but we don't budget well so it feels like a surprise. Well, I think it just feels expensive because it is also the same time of year that fall and winter sports fees are being paid and that costs a pretty penny when you have a herd in sports.

*This weekend I would like to wash and wax my floors and clean out under our stairs. Cleaning and organizing is soothing for me.

*The herd is going to start chores again. I need to put together their list this weekend. They're not excited about it and I get that. However, I can't do everything and it is time for me to get help.

*Tomorrow the girls have hair appointments. I am thinking that I will sneak off in the afternoon to go get some work clothes and a manicure.

 *I cannot believe that this is the last weekend before school is back in session. Summer literally flew by! It is going to be football and hoodie season here very soon.

*I'm tired of feeling stuck. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. The sooner I find a way to become unstuck the better.

I have so many things that I want to get done this weekend and I am hopeful that I will be able to get them taken care of so I can relax before the chaos of the new school year is upon us.

Until next time,

xoxo

Let me reintroduce myself...

I saw this amazingly inspiring post over on Lulu & Sweet Pea's blog and knew that this was a direction I needed to go with my post tonight. I was just rambling last night about all of these things that I used to be and gave virtually no regard to who I am now. So tonight I am going to share things about myself that you may or may not want to know about me. Here goes nothing...

• I am a mother to a 14 year old daughter and 11 year old son. 
• I am a stepmother to a 14 year old daughter and 11 year old son. (Yes I wrote step in front of mother but not in front of my relationship with them, because they are my children and the word step doesn't define my relationship with them.)
• My Mister is in the military so I am Household Six 
• I'm a stay at home mom. I don't love it, but I am sure I will miss it when I go back to work. 
• I'm a graduate student and will be starting my 30 hour/week internship next week. Good luck me! 
• I love nail polish and to paint my nails. I hate chipped polish and I just can't get down with it.
• I love makeup! It makes me feel beautiful.
• I have deep set eyes and cannot pull of winged eyeliner. Therefore, I live vicariously through my daughter and her winged liner. 
• I have naturally wavy hair and I used to hate it. Now I hate that I'm losing my hair. I definitely took it for granted. 
• I love self help books and legal/thriller fiction books. 
• I never wanted to move outside of my home state and then I got the opportunity to do so. We moved back and I'm itching to move somewhere else. 
• I rarely feel content. I need to fix that. 
• Cuss words are my favorite thing to say when I'm around other adults. 
• I love hoop earrings. The bigger the hoop the better 
• I am obsessed with minivans. I love my minivan (and the fact that she's paid off) and will drive her until she quits on me, but I am always checking out other minivans anticipating which one I will get next. Haha
• I can be impatient and bossy. I assume it has to do with my birth order (first born) and the fact that I'm a Leo. 
• I am my own worst critic 
• My life has revolved around my mister and the herd for so long it is scary to start focusing on me. 
• Target is my jam! I would give them all our money if we didn't have bills to pay
• Amazon prime is the second best thing to Target. 
• I'm funny, witty and I always laugh at my jokes
• To-do lists are my favorite thing to write. My least favorite thing to write are papers, but I do it. 
• Cooking is something I have gotten better with over the years, but I don't always enjoy it. 
• Grocery shopping is my foe 
• I wish I was bilingual, but I'm not so that sucks 
• Colored ink and new planners/calendars make my heart happy! 
• I spend too much money on eyeshadow palettes
• Shopping cures any bad day
• Handbags are my weakness
• Organizing and rearranging things makes me feel accomplished
• Clutter and I are not friends 
• I don't enjoy change, but I don't like things always being the same 
• I'm difficult and complicated at times so it seems like I'm hard to please. Reality is I'm not content and I don't always know what I want.
• Running a household is a lot of work, who knew adulting wasn't that much fun?! 
• I overthink things and I often overshare 
• I raise my voice at my kids
• I'm not perfect but I'm me and that's where I'm going to end this tonight. 

Until next time, 

xoxo

Getting that self respect

Earlier in the month I read an article on Facebook where the author talks about 30 things that you stop doing when you have self respect. I don't recall who wrote it, but I loved it so much that I wrote down the key points in my journal. Tonight I was flipping through and saw it and took a moment to reflect on what it means for me in my life.

I don't do a good job setting boundaries in my personal relationships with people. I don't say "yes" when I should because I'm exhausted from all of times I said yes when I really should have said "no". It is my own fault really, as I am tirelessly trying to please others while not taking care of myself when and how I should. One of the main areas of focus for my 36th year is self care and learning to love myself better.

It seems like a lifetime ago that I made time for the things that I love in life, things that made me happy which, in turn, made me a better person. I used to be carefree. I used to be down for whatever. There are so many things I used to be. I don't know when or where that changed, but I often find my mind wandering back to those days and trying to figure out where it went wrong. Yes, I said wrong! What the heck is wrong with me?! NOTHING! People change, people grow and the ups and downs I've gone through over the years have shaped me into the person that I am now. I no longer am interested in going out to bars and hanging out until early morning hours. That's okay. I prefer to hang around the house and that's okay. I like to plan things in advance and I no longer find it fun to have things pop up at the last minute. That's okay. What I really need is to just be okay with who I've become. I hear a lot of "well you used too..." yes I did, past tense.

This is the year I want to say yes when I mean and a firm no when I don't. I want to take better care of myself. I want to accept my changes and be okay with it. Haters be damned! The only approval that I need is that of myself! I will not try to get ahead of myself here, it will be hard work and it will take time. I have high hopes for this year. I believe that 36 is going to be a big year for me, one of big changes, new adventures, and so many wonderful things! I cannot wait to see what it brings and I am ready to put in the work to get there!

Until next time,

xoxo

It's all about the 3's

Three favorite foods

Waffles with cool whip 

Pizza 

Mexican food 

Three things I'd never give up

Good food 

Good company 

Shopping 

Three favorite cocktails

I 

don't 

drink

Three favorite movies

Pretty Woman 

Legally Blonde 

The Little Mermaid

Three favorite simple pleasures in life

Sleeping until I wake up-No alarm!

Watching my children in their element when they don't think I am watching

Baby cuddles 

Three things that are always in my car

My handbag

A trunk full of sporting equipment

Blankets 

Three things I always have with me

Phone

My rings 

chaptstick

Three things I regret doing/not doing

Doing a workout when I have a chance 

Going for runs 

Eating dessert after every meal!

Three most recent places I traveled to

Dick's sporting goods

softball fields

football field

Three most often used makeup products

Bare Minerals Foundation 

Highlighter

Blush

Three things that make me cry

Stress 

Happy times 

Touching movies/shows/books

Three things that make me smile/laugh

Babies/Toddlers

My family 

My friends 

Three places I want to visit in the U.S.

Seattle 

California 

New York 

Three places I want to visit outside the U.S.

Spain 

Italy 

Bahamas 

Three blessings in my life

My health 

My Mister and our Herd 

Each day that I am given 

Until next time, 

xoxo